Hometreading: Homesteading When You’re Barely Treading Water

The Homestead Lifestyle Attempt from a Working Mom

I’ve been carrying around a dream for years — a dream where I’d be this aesthetic homemaker. I’d be this bohemian beauty with her hands in the dirt and the dough making some kind of beautiful life for her family out of the flour and soil.

Instead, I feel like I am a very frazzled, withering cow — working desperately to keep cash and milk flowing. The table is full, not of meals but of mess. Our home aesthetic is a clash of clutter rather than a curated collection of art.

Making the Dough or Making a Home?

I’m barely treading water these days. To be honest, I was barely getting by before kids. Now, with two little ones under two, a husband, a 65-pound hound dog, two cats, and a full-time job —we’re scraping by, y’all. Physically, financially, emotionally — we’re trying to figure it all out. I count it a win if we all manage to eat at the table. Bonus points if we’re all together!

Shout out to the moms who can pull that off while making food from scratch, homegrown, with a full face of makeup, hair done and nails painted. My scraggly self is just trying to grow her hair back postpartum.

We’re treading treading home and kids and work. Treading life.

Life ain’t pretty, but it’s beautiful

I certainly don’t live a social-media-filter kind of life. But I’m discovering there is much more beauty in the chaos and the ordinary if I just pay closer attention (and let go of my little spurts of anxiety).

My husband, even with his disarray of books and scraps of paper (none of which are apparently trash) and instruments and clothes, has the most beautiful mind, soothing voice, and the deepest love of people. Plus, he’s got the prettiest eyes, smile and actually likes to cook (the man’s a real catch).

My babies, even with the whining, screeching, crumbs, early mornings and so much poop, have the best smiles (from their daddy), the sweetest voices and the best personalities.

My dog, even with her lack of personal space or awareness and very, very long limbs, is the most loyal and gentle companion. And at least one of the cats loves me with his entire heart, bless him.

Life’s not pretty. Life’s not easy, but gosh darn, life is beautiful. And it’s a whole lot of fun, too.

Becoming a Mom of All Trades

Clearly, I’m not what you’d call a tradwife — not by a long shot. I work in the digital marketing and healthcare industries. I embrace tech, vaccines and all the other non-traditional taboos. And yet I also attend church on Sundays, make sourdough bread and planted blueberries in the backyard while my toddler runs barefoot and barely dressed.

I’ve definitely googled “how to homeschool your kids while working full-time” and have read the Montessori toddler books, all while putting in long days spent architecting data mapping and problem solving HIPAA requirements to measure ROI for effective marketing campaigns. Such fun.

I’ve been trying to figure out how to do all these things and do them well.

• Can I be a happy homemaker and breadwinner?

• How do I be the best mom, wife and earner I can be?

• How do I give my all to all of it?

I used to think, “Well, it’s just not possible. You can’t have it all.”

But lately I’ve been at this point of desperation, where choosing one over the other is just not optional. I have to keep bringing in the dough because I want to provide for the family. I have to be present for my kids because I want them to know I’m there for them no matter what. I have to invest in my family and relationships because love is what matters most in the world.

And I have to be the best version of myself to make it happen and stay sane.

It just doesn’t have to be perfect or pretty. But making the dough and making a home can be possible with a little creativity and maybe some extra caffeine.

Come with me on this journey. I know I’m not the only one who desired to make a living and a life.

Hometreading vs. Homesteading

My dream isn’t to be a homesteader but a “hometreader.” I’m not aiming for the perfect homesteading life. Being a stay-at-home mom, while something I admire and respect, is just not in the cards for me and our family. Not now, anyway. Instead, the best I can offer my family and myself is what I can. Little, incremental changes to give them the life and instill the values that mean so much to me.

Sometimes the best way to start is simply to begin — homesteading shouldn’t be any different. At least, that’s what I keep telling myself.

First, What is Homesteading?

A little history lesson for ya from the internet:

The “homesteading” term has deep roots, going back to the 19th century with the Homestead Acts in the U.S, where people were granted land to cultivate and settle. Today’s homesteading is a lifestyle focused on self-sufficiency, sustainability, and a return to traditional practices.

In essence, modern homesteading is about creating a lifestyle that is more in tune with nature, reduces dependency on commercial systems, and fosters a sense of independence and resilience.

Second, Why Practice Homesteading at All?

As a busy, working mom of two littles… why on earth would I want to invest even MORE work into my life?

I grew up in the suburbs of North Florida, in a middle-class, tightly-knit family with southern roots. I’m talking about boiled peanuts, church potlucks, and endless hours of running around outside. The homemade and homegrown traditions from my childhood have stuck with me.

My grandparents were the ones who taught me how to sew, garden, and cook. But they also taught me much more — things you can’t just learn on your own. They showed me the importance of loving your neighbors, praying without ceasing, and opening your heart and home to others. Their actions spoke louder than words and left a lasting imprint on my life.

Hand-me-down Values are Still Valuable

My kids won’t have the chance to know my grandparents. But even though what I pass on might be a diluted version, I hope to impart as much as I can to the next generation. It’s not just about creating sweet memories of snapping green beans, picking berries, baking bread, or learning to sew. While I cherish those nostalgic moments, I now understand the sweat and love that went into them — and the deeper value they hold.

I grew up with values like:

Building Community and relationships

You’ve heard it takes a village. People used to have one. We want to cultivate our village. We want to know our neighbors, support each other, share with each other and give to each other.

Do-It-Yourself (DIY) Attitude

There’s something empowering about learning to do things for yourself. Saving money where you can to invest in greater, more meaningful experiences. Whether it’s fixing, making or growing things yourself. And if it saves a few dollars, even better.

Being a Good Steward

Stewardship for me means living with intention and limiting waste where we can. It means being mindful of our belongings, caring for what we have and recycling. I believe we’re asked to care for the environmental and financial resources we’re blessed with in the most responsible ways.

Starting my “Hometreading” Journey

Key aspects of contemporary homesteading that appeal to me include:

Food Production:

Many homesteaders grow their own fruits, vegetables, and herbs, and even raise livestock like chickens, goats, or bees for eggs, milk, meat, and honey. I don’t know how much of this I can do. My husband is thankfully a good gardener and I used to garden as a kid. We’ve had success with beans and herbs but both want to grow more produce. And I dream of my own beehive someday.

Preserving and Fermenting:

Think canning, fermenting, and preserving food to ensure a year-round supply. Homesteaders often make their own bread and even butter, cheese, kombucha, ginger bug and yogurt. Why does this appeal to me? For one thing, I read a book about the benefits of fermented foods (also homegrown, raw foods as above). I haven’t tried canning yet and the furthest I’ve gotten into fermentation is sourdough. But even getting strategic about freezing food (and milk) has been a game changer for us.

DIY and Craftsmanship:

Homesteaders typically emphasize do-it-yourself (DIY) projects, making their own clothing, furniture, soap, or soap. Ok — I made soap as a middle schooler — same year I gardened and sewed with my grandparents and it can be addictive.

Sustainability and Conservation:

Homesteading often goes hand-in-hand with environmental consciousness, with a focus on reducing waste, recycling, composting, and using sustainable farming and building practices.

Community and Trading

While self-sufficiency is a goal, many homesteaders also participate in local communities, trading goods and services with others and sharing knowledge and resources.

Homesteading for the Working Gal

If you’re looking for the traditional wife, the stay-at-home-mom who is homesteading and homeschooling beautifully, clearly I’m not your cup of sweet tea and that’s ok! Hometreading, my unique version of homesteading, is more about the “not-quite” trad wife — the one with some traditional values but far from old school. The one who grew up on Mrs. Frizzle’s “get messy and make mistakes” motto, navigating the fullness of life and family in the modern age. The “I-work-in-tech-Monday-through-Friday” and “I-make-sourdough-with-my-kids-on-the-weekends” kind of homesteading.

If that’s you, too, let’s do this! Let’s make mistakes, get messy and do our best.